Remnants of A Lonely Past

On tangled webs and evergreens, we spin towards the end
As another year begins to fade, into the shadows of the night

I watch from my second story loft
In the hope of finding faces, to fill my empty thoughts

Leaving only the leaves of late December
Moving silently across the lawn, to stir a chill in me

Remaining me of what was lost, and what was gained
Remnants of a lonely past, I'll never see again

While the pursuit into the realm of another time
Lingers in my heart, as I wonder what's to come

So I'll gather with hope and prayer, as I ponder what lies ahead
Wishing the best for one and all, in the wake of this New Year

May God Bless each one of you, who'll read between these dreams
In the ramblings of a man unsure, of what lies around the bend

So pray along with me, for brighter days to come
Believe my friends, that's all it takes, to make our hopes come true

For in that yoke of darkness, which surrounds our mortal souls
Shall be lifted by the Son of Man, as he descends upon his throne

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
December 26, 2007

Song for Merry Poets

Dedicated: Members of poetry2share

May God Bless you Merry Poets, who share your thoughts with me
I'm here to sing this song for you, so please bear with me my tune
I wish the very best for you, and may all your dreams come true
In the hope that all will be OK, I pray
In the hope that all will be OK

On this birthday of our Lord, our Christ who died for all our sins
He came to save the world for us, if we only all believe
So keep your spirits in your heart, and share what you can spare
And bring joy to the world we know, and love
And bring you to the world we know and love

Merry Christmas, & Happy New Year, fellow poets, puddles singing off

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
December 18, 2007

Fog of Destiny

I hear a calling, which beckons me
To a place which inflames the cold

The ocean blue, beneath the keel
Is a haven, which gets in one's soul

It thickened the joy of being young
Even when you're lost in time

Grey skies,above tall masts
And a boat, that is part of my past

Is all that's left of the fantasies?
I've learned to keep to myself?

How I yearn to be back at sea
Within the shelter of my ship

Riding upon the cresting swells
In the wake of an endless swirl

Where the moon rises, the mist lies
Amid the fog, that hides destiny?

But the years march on, my youth left behind
With only memories, to cherish my thoughts

So I sit in my chair, with a look of despair
As I recall the thundering sails

Filled by the winds, that carries the lights
From the Northern Hemisphere

Wishing to return, to the place I call home
What envisions appear in my tears?

So I'll dream of the days, and the salty spray
From an ocean that's no longer mine

As my ship harbors me, in one final voyage
To the port, where my heart longs to be

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
Dec. 10, 2007

Poet of The Month

To Alan & Mystic

Thanks every so much for this special honor
It shall remain with me for as long as I write

Words which comes in the gift
From God above

Roland
Nov. 22, 2007

Twilight of Time

Sealed within the shadows, in the twilight of time

Looms the memories of our wayward dreams

They come with all our yesterdays, as the early morning dawns

In this never-ending cycle, as the stars begin to dim

I think of the troubled years, we've shared along the way

The good, and bad, even the awful shame, never seems to fade

This appears to be a part of us, within the shelter of our hearts

A reminder of the treasures in life, as we entwine into the light

Upon that bridge of destiny, which is soon to enfold

We'll age with total grace, towards that final goal

But not before I tell you, how much you've meant to me

With sad regrets, I seldom mention, how I truly feel

The essence which dwells inside my soul, has always been for you

So in the travels to a new beginning, as our sun begins to set

Remember my dear, between the sorrows

Reside the tears of passion, I've always held for you

If you could just forgive, all the hurt I caused

I wish in the days remaining, to smother your thoughts with love

So take my hand, hold me tight, and never let me go

For in the time God grants to us, the best has yet to come

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz

November 07, 2007

Sweet Desire

Like the passions within a wishing well
Which no longer flows with dreams

Lies the thoughts of all the love I keep
Between the loneliness of my tears

I think of you each passing night
As I drift into a daze

In the shadows of your memories
Are heard the melodies of sweet desire

They come before the twilight
It wakes me to the dawn

Reminding me of that last embrace
Before the Angels took your soul

I cry each night, for the lullabies
We'll never share together

But this I know, as sure as the sun
Rises above the morning dew

That special day will arrive again
When together we'll be as one

In the songs we'll sing in harmony
Will be to praise our Lord and savior

For in the universe he calls his home
We shall live forever, in the paradise of his love

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
November 1, 2007

Headless Rider

Dedicated: Poetry2Share

I dreamt a scary dream, just the other night
It woke me up before the dawn

My sheets were wet with sweat
As I was petrified with fear

So I'll tell you of the nightmare, to put my mind at ease
For it's the eve of October, soon the goblins will appear

It starts with mystic bells, ringing so loud and clear
Which brings the sounds of a headless rider, astride a blacken horse

Riding silently in an ancient land, with only numbers by his name
He holds a bloody blade upright, dripping with the stench of death

He cuts across the meadow, beyond the ageless moors
Towards a rustic castle, with death etched upon his sword

On a steed that has no heart, he rides towards a kill
He comes from hell, God help us all, to rid the fear he brings

Within the manor beyond the glen, reside four knights reposed
Not knowing the evil that comes their way, they sleep into the night

A chill so cold that stings the skin, wakes Sir Alan from his bed
His fantasies of a painted lady he calls Doreen, fades fast into the dew

He hears a deafening sound, as the headless horseman explodes unto the ground
He wakes his fellow knights in haste, to face what comes from hell

Sir Claude, Sir William, Sir Berry, will protect the home they know
They'll fight to their very death, to Lord Roland they owe this due

As the black hearted rider, stands at center court
The four brave knights unleashed their swords, to slay this wicked mass

Just as they were to clash, I woke to the fullmoon, and the sounds of thunder
Not knowing how this all came out, I ponder did evil slay the knights

There is a silverlining to my imagination
The tale I've told will come again, before Allhallows Eve

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
October 23, 2007

Author's Note
Sorry Alan, here in Texas I'm unable to be the Lord of my castle
But in England, that's another story, Happy Halloween

Rapture of the Deep

Dedicated: To the brave men, serving beneath the sea

In the innocence of your eyes
Lies the volume of an empty heart

It pulls towards a craving, within the whispers of the wind
Half hidden from the longing, which remains inside of me?

Six months out from land, without the sky to even view
Makes this tour of duty lonely, amid the deep which we endure

Each day our dreams are separated, by the loneliness of despair
Gives me thought of how I miss you, in the remoteness which we share

In the solitude of my bunk, in the hours I have free
I contemplate caressing the softness of your touch, as I kiss your tears away

The memories kept within my soul, grows stronger by the day
For I know very soon, I'll be back between your arms, to share eternal love

Until that time arrives, I'll perform a seaman's duty
Aboard this mighty boat, which patrols beneath this briny?

For I'm a submariner a member of the crew
We set sail, on a voyage forging onwards

To secure the peace, bound in silence
Amongst the rapture of the deep

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
October 02, 2007

Slumber of My Dreams

A convoy of U.S. military vehicles moves through the Kuwaiti desert toward the Iraqi border

Dedicated: To the men and women, in a far away land

In between reality and the slumber of my dreams
Lies the softness of the love, which caress each thought of you

Every night that separates our lives, brings tears to my aching heart
While the sadness contained within my soul, is too much for me too hold

So I'll think of you each moment, in this land so filled with fear
As we trek across the painted sands, in the duty I swore to adhere

I truly hope God keeps me safe, and brings me home to you
To be inside your loving arms, is all that I do pray

So fear not my darling wife, I shall return to fill your life with love
Within the slumber of our dreams, we'll share each night together

Resides the true reality of peace
Which came with the price, we suffered

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
September 22, 2007

Multitude of Blazing Stars

Their is a multitude of blazing stars, flashing across the sky

They each contain our names encompassed, since the very first moment of time

Some shine brighter then others, while many go unnoticed
I sometimes wish I could sparkle, and be seen by many others

For God knows each of us by heart, even before we're born
He gives us life along the way, and we're the ones who'll decide

What course to take, in our travel towards the end, as we streak across the sky?
In the years that are given, many choose to ignore his name, forget he even exists

Within his grace even those who blaspheme his name, can come back into the fold
The price which was paid, by the death of his Son, upon that wooden cross

I hope my star carries me to the place he calls his home
For I know I'll glitter like a diamond, in the sky he calls his own

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
September 19, 2007

The Aftermath

Dedicated: Those left homeless by Hurricane Katrina

As I look upon the spot, I left just two years ago this month
I see the emptiness before my eyes, and not much has changed today

A hurricane named Katrina paid a visit that fateful day
She brought much death and damage, to those who stayed and prayed

I was one of many, who decided to leave in haste
For I have seen all this before, have felt the savage of Mother Nature

Her fury contains no mercy, for those who decide to stay
Leaving all I loved to find a safer haven, then the one we left that day

With my children and only memories, we drove from New Orleans in tears
Before the storm came ashore, and raped the city we loved

Now two years have passed, and not much has really changed
The politicians say so much, they all mean so well

But just look around, in between the streets, only dreams remain
Of what this city once was, and now will never be

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
September 08, 2007

Fruits of Wild Desires

I come to wonder how one accepts the fruits of wild desires
Do we climb into a darken cavern, and hide the flames of passion

Or face the ragged feelings, which keep our hearts at bay
I have noticed in the years of struggle, that love is ever fragile

Once broken, embracing lips will never taste the same
Such is the lesson one learns, in the haunts of an immoral life

Along with the truth of broken dreams, comes tears filled with lies
Which I thought were hidden from you, in the secrets I kept inside

I have turned away the love, from the woman that's been my wife
To bear the essences of lust, which has cast my soul to hell?

For within this dungeon of a sadden heart, which beats a lonely chord
Lay the visions of all the hurt I caused, along with the price I'll pay?

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
August 26, 2007

The Ebbs and Flows of Time

Have you ever wondered about the ebbs and flows of time?
The ups and downs, the turnarounds, which makes our lives surreal

Arriving upon an age far detached from the youth, I once embraced
I begin to view the ease of life's simplicities, in the autumn of the years

Wishfully looking towards the past, where lies my inner core
Praying and hoping the good outweighs the bad, as I seek a higher ground

Uncertain of what lingers ahead, I gingerly stay on this narrow course
Reluctantly accepting the errors of my ways, as I forge towards my goal

Following the pattern within my soul, to fine some peace of mind
For I am tired, ready to rest my weary bones, as the sun begins to dim

So I will prepare for what's to come, as the bridge comes to an end
In asking the holy savior, to melt my sins away

For in the ebb and flow of time, reside the true delusions
Which erupts with pure rapture, in the radiances of his love?

In this delirious state of redeeming grace, our Lord grants to each of us
Lies the path to infinity, with his death upon the cross

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
August 22, 2007

Kaleidoscope of Hope

In God's kaleidoscope of hope, lies the majesty of his gifts
Which comes four times each year, in the creation of the seasons?

For in the vastness of his domain, contains the reason for each change
As he paints with golden hues, across the canvas of the sky

Spring brings new beginning, to fill the earth with joy
Just look at the birds as they nestle within, the confines of the trees

While summer carries the heat, to give foliage that brings the shade
You will see this as the sun, tracks across the painted plains

Then comes fall to cool and slowdown, the growth encountered
Which readies us for what is to come, as the sun begins its tilt?

Lastly comes the winter, which impedes our growing pains
The leaves begin to fall, the birds in flights are gone

This is just my feelings, for the reasons of the seasons
I thought to share the impressions, imprinted within my heart

But the one who really knows, the majesty of these gifts
Is our God so high above, the creator of all that is known?

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
August 7, 2007

Valley of Shadows

Into the valley of shadows, I walk with perilousness care

Not knowing where I'm going, not sure I even care

These dreams and more come to me, in the darkness of the night
As I seek to fine the peace of mind, within the brightness from the light

I fear what lays ahead of me, as the years slowly shows my age
Is their life on the other side, or does the finality end with me

So many questions abound, about what lies beyond the grave
Only death will bring the answers, to the knowledge, left unknown

So I'll place my faith in the one who knows, as I prepare to go my way
For the valley of shadows, which awaits for me, will no longer be of dreams

And the reality, not the finality will be my eternal reward
As I search to find my savior, in the brightness of his home

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
August 4, 2007

Soldiers, So Brave & Bold

Dedicated To: Anthony Thomas Gonzalez

On golden sands with silver wings, I walk towards your dreams

They come at night when I'm alone, which brings comfort to my soul

Riding along this corridor, in a hell hole that's called Iraq
Thoughts are shared within this Humvee, to calm the fears we have

As we trek onwards to our destination, and hope no blood is shed
For bombs are hidden everywhere, just waiting for us to pass

While the politicians sit at home, and decide what fate we'll take
The war goes on no end in site, as our President remains steadfast

So we'll plow ahead hoping for the best, in a war that seems unfair
Praying for brighter minds to prevail, in sending the troops back home

But until that time arrives, and we return to the land we love
Our orders remain ever so clear, as so the duty we swore to uphold

To defend the honor of this nation, until our orders are changed
On a road caked with the blood of soldiers, so brave and bold

Who gave their all for God and country, as only heroes can?
The dreams of peace remain in us, as we pray to survive this day

And the thoughts for you will be of the love we share, which keeps my sanity
As we ride upon the desert sands toward the city, they call Baghdad

Written by Roland R. Ruiz
July 20, 2007

Innocence of Youth

In Memory: Simon & Mary Ruiz

If you could see me know, you will know time has passed my by
The innocence of youth, has turned my black hair gray

While approaching my golden years, memories begin to fade
As I start to age gracefully, to where I am today

In sharing the naked truth, of almost sixty years
I hope the thoughts for me, will fill your heart with glee

So I'll send my best to each of you
Who view this childhood photo?

Which came from my family album?
Of the way, I used to be

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
July 22, 2007

Twilight of the Stars

Their's majesty abound in the turbulence of a ragging sea
It reflects atop the drifting wake, which never seems to end

As the sun lowers into the horizon, between the jutting masts
The view towards eternity, is etched upon my mind, as the daylight turns to night

Staring down at the broaching waves on the starboard side of the deck
I think of the kiss you gave to me, so many years ago

While the whispers from the wind, which slaps against the planks
Forms a prayer to the maker, the God who created all

Inside the north Atlantic, riding the shifting swells, on a ship I call my home
I see your face imprinted, within the twilight of the stars

It appears again in beams which shine so bright, below the cresting moon
To dwell for you means so much too me, but you're not their to even touch

Six months out from St. John's Bay, on a whaler named Evangeline
Makes the memory of your last embrace, almost too much to bear

And it seems to be coming more each day, as the months drag into the year
While we try to fill our hull, with what lies beneath the sea

It's the whales which drives us forth, to smelt the gold that lies within their mass
Until our ship has reached its goal, we'll stay alert and vigilant, hoping to find our way

Wishing for the voyage home, where I long to be, between your waiting arms
To hug and kiss away the pain of loneliness, how I'll covet that day

Until the time arrives my dear, and together we'll be as one
I'll do my work faithfully, and pray for our safe return

For the images of your beauty, which resides within my soul?
Is reflected amidst the Northern Lights, which glitters before the dawn

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
July 7, 2007

Lullaby of Dreams

If cries of weeping sorrow, along with thoughts I hold for you
Could be put into a dream, as I fall into a trance

The joy of total bliss with you, would caress each night with lust
I think of you when you're away, unable to hear your voice

The lullabies I sing to you, in the fantasies of my dreams
Makes me think you'll soon return, and fill my nights with love

Since you've left to fight a war, which seems so far away
I feel the lonely void, that share the days with me

I know the job you chose, forces us apart at times
But I never thought the separation, would last this awful long

The days have changed to months, and the months has become a year
How I wish the honor you uphold, could be an afterthought

I pine each night when you're not their, to share this bed with me
The empty pillow where you once reclined, is what I face each night

While the war you fight so far away, brings grief to my aching heart
I know one day this will change, and we'll settle into a normal life

But until that time arrives, my dear
I'll pray God shields your every breath, and brings you safely home

For the illusions I'll have of you tonight
Will last till the dawning of the morn, as you fade into the dew

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
June 27, 2007

Skies of Montana

Dedicated To: Bill Blackwood

Embellished between the emptiness
Of the wild Montana skies

I hear the whispers, of a distant past
Which lies beneath my wings?

A calling I'm unable to deny
Is heard within the clouds, which dart in front of me

With only the hum of my twin engines, to keep me company
I steer this craft, with breathless thoughts, across the endless sky

I think back to younger days, in my dreams of yesteryear
Wishing I could go back, and begin all over again

Correcting mistakes made, in the years left to me
To change what was lost

In the harm, which I caused
To the ones that I love so much

If only this could be, before I'm laid to rest
As I climb atop the snow covered mountains

Heading west across the wilderness, which lie before my eyes
I search for grace, to heal the pain that remains inside of me

I hear the echoes of another voice
Towards the peace, where my soul longs to be

It calls me back, to where I belong
A wayward son returning, to the family he left behind

And a home, where my heart will never leave
As I carried along with the wind

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
June 09, 2007

Rainbow of Tears

There are rainbows in the sky
Which holds our hopes and dreams?

They come whenever God sheds his tears
For all that we have done

The pain and hurt we give each other
Is just a part of life?

For the very ones we love so much
Are the ones we hurt the most

Sometimes I wonder, why God allows
The anguish to be so rampant

But it's the free will, he gives to all
Which turn our hearts to stone?

I'll question not, what comes my way
But accept the fate, I'm handed

And pray for the rainbows, in the sky
To brighten up our days

So the tears from God, will not rain sadness
Upon our wretched souls

But bring the happiness, he meant to be
Upon this wayward child

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
June 3, 2007

Measure of Fragrance

In our travels across the web, we call life

Have you ever marveled at what lies within?

I have often wondered about the effects of love
As to what kind of spark, will it take?

To ignite the flames of desires
Between the rapture of two lovers hearts

As we merge into a single lane, upon the edge of time
Heading towards the end, to a judgment we must face

The thoughts of how we came to be
Begins to stir in me, as I asked myself

Could it be when the fires of love begin to grow?
It leaves a measure of fragrance, of what is yet to come

Thus bringing magic to our inner core
Especially when you are near, and your presence is felt

The closest of your scent, brings contentment to my soul
While the thoughts of what is yet to be

Lies deeply entrenched in each caress
As we dance to the brink of time

Towards the destiny, we call romance
And like two lovers, who share one heart

The sands of time, will forever flow

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
May 13, 2007

Wings of Angels

I can't remember when
I can't remember how

It seems I'm in a daze
So strange the sights I see

My mind unable to explain
All the wonders before my eyes

So I forge ahead, trying to comprehend
What lies in front of me

Searching for a soul
To tell me where I am

I look around, not even sounds
To make me feel at home

If only I could remember
Of how I got to here

As I look to find my way
It seems I'm in a cloud

Nothing but the sky
To the right and left of me

I begin to hear some noise
Just to the side of me

As I get a little closer
The sounds become familiar

For the chirping of many birds
Has set my mind at ease

Now my fears have been subdued
For I know I'm not alone

So I walk a little faster
Towards the clamor, I hear so clear

Now I look for something else
Besides the birds which follow me

Still not sure just where I am
Now I hear the flap of wings

Too strong to be just birds
The noise lies between the mists

As I strain to get a better view
It starts to dawn on me

The wings of Angels, is what I hear
They lie within the clouds

As the road begins to narrow
While turning to a golden hue

Now I start to remember
Of lying on a wrinkled bed

Not even able to move
The pain too much to bear

So I pray with all my heart
For God to take my soul

To release me from the hurt
Which has been a part of me

The last thing I recall
Was calling Jesus' name

Asking for his forgiveness
For all the sins I've made

Now I know just where I am
And found the reason why

My time has run its course
I suffer no more pain

Even the clouds have left
And a golden gate appears

Which opens wide for me
And God is on the other side

With his Son, who welcomes me
They give a smile my way

As we walk into their palace
To a room, reserved for me

As I turn around to thank them
Jesus begins to speak

He says dear son, been waiting on you
So glad you finally came

For I gave my life, so you could be
Here in my Father's home

Then the Father turns to me
And he looks me in the eye

And says what a son has I
So proud he's here with me

For he gave his earthly life
To those who truly believe

And now enjoy your stay
My son has paid the price

For all who believe in him
And the eternal peace he brings

In my kingdom, which will be your home
For the rest of eternity

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
May 10, 2007

Towards Forever

There is a highway in the sky
Which flows towards forever?

To those who have lived a virtuous life
The stars will shine like diamonds, to guide you along the way

And for those who create misery for others
Only darkness will fill the void, leading to oblivion

At the beginning of my end, their lies a road without a name
As I travel forward, seeking to find the heartaches I left behind

It starts to dawn on me, how cruel time can be
In trying to put back the pieces, to all that has been lost

So I gather my thoughts, as best I can
Before the tears, begin to flow for the memories we once held

I thought how hard it would be, to let you know the score
To tell you the love we shared, has gone to another's heart

It's never easy to tell someone, the way one truly feels
So you must know the truth my dear, for their can be no other way

The love which once I held for you, belongs to someone else
So do not fear my worthy wife, as I'll offer you this final advice

The highway will be clear for you, as you travel towards your end
You have lived a righteous life, for all that you have given

It's I who will pay the price, for the sins which I committed
For your carriageway in the sky, will have signposts to show the way

While I'll slither along on the road to oblivion
For the hurt I caused and the love I surrendered

In turning away from you

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
April 24, 2007

Highway to Oblivion

In the years you've lived, have you ever driven to the top of a hill?
After reaching the summit, you notice a long winding slope

Heading towards oblivion, on a crossroad known as life?
Unsure of what direction to travel, so you take the high road, and hope for the best

As I follow the whispering caverns, along this road of strife
I seek to find the peace of mind, which seems to have eluded me

Ever since you left my side, to be with someone else
You took away my beating heart leaving me lost and alone, unable to find my way

So I'll gather my th0ughts as best I can, and try to forget the hurt you caused
For all the love we shared is gone, as I search within myself for the very reasons why

Only the illusion of wayward fantasies, is all that's left behind
So the road I choose will stay unknown, until I reach the end

But this for sure will remain with me, as I thread forward in my life
Memories of better times along with tears we've shed, in the years we shared as one

Will help to keep me on the straight and narrow, leading to just full end?
So I'll carry your thoughts within my soul, until you fade away

While I'll search the highways of loneliness, in the caverns of my dreams
For one who will turn my night into day

And will share with me the emotion of true love?
The way it was meant to be

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
April 16, 2007

Flood of Thoughts

Dedicated to: alytatt, Msytic, CPD, paintedlady & the members of Poetry2Share

To those of you will will read and hear my words of verse
I wish to convey in my thoughts, of how they came to be

Sometimes they arrive in the middle of the day
Most often they come while I sleep, in the wee hours of the morn

Where a phrase or sentence will reach my heart, in the shadows of the night
From a source that was totally unknown, until I heard a voice

At first I thought it couldn't be, a sound so clear, and concise
Then it began to dawn on me, of God's mysterious ways

So when these thoughts appear to me, I arise slowly, so not to wake my wife
With a sentence or phrase freshly imprinted, so I carefully write them down

Then I crawl back into bed and quickly fall asleep, waking to the morning dew
At first I wondered how this could be, is it just a fantasy of my dreams

But as I gaze upon my writing pad, a flood of thoughts begin to flow
Soon the words, which came to me, starts to forge into a write

I know this may sound strange to you, but an Angel does come to me
In the middle of my dreams, and she gives to me a special gift, that comes from high above

Guardian Angels are abound, for God has need of them
To spread the gifts he gives to all, in the words that we convey

So I'll honor what my Angel brings, and share my gift with you
For I know God meant for this to be, in the prose he sends to me

One other thought before I go, I wonder how your poems, are implanted upon your being
Do they arrive like mine, from Heaven above, or do they form another way

I leave you with this final thought, as I prepare to go my way
I pray your dreams, will impart sweet stanzas, to share with us today

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
April 09, 2007

Dreams & Wonders

Have you ever wanted to ride a shooting star?

Or travel beneath the sea, where no man has tread before

I for one have thought of this, and so much more
As I sit in my wheelchair, without my legs, which I lost in a far away war

So I'll ponder all the dreams and wonders which I'll never do
And try to accomplish in my attitude, all that I can be

I gave my service to the United States Army
In a duty performed with honor, from a land of desert and sun

Were we find ourselves involved in a war, so different from others we fought before
Engaging an enemy who shows no fear of death, even killing themselves

But in doing so, they take so many others, in the innocence of their youth
I can't help but think when it shall end, as the death toll mounts each day

I've often been asked, if the limbs I lost, worth the price I paid
The answer is clear and simple, for a soldier I chose to be

Many others will never be asked, their price of war was death
So their words remain silent, unspoken, but not forgotten, in the memories that's held for them

For myself I'll accept the cards, in the hand that was dealt by fate
And seek the wonders of my dreams, in the years God grants to me

I'll never regret in serving my country, an honor I'll always respect
And I'll pray for peace to invade the hearts, of those who lead this strife

To bring this ordeal to a final conclusion
And call our brave troops back home

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
March 23, 2007

The Starlit Sky

Dedicated To: Tommy Riddle

As I gaze towards the starlit sky
In the autumn of my years

I view the many painted stars
Like the patterns in my life

Some twinkle brightly others dimly
As the moon begins its rise

So I'll contemplate and meditate
What passes between the sighs?

And try to calm the fears I have
Of what lies on the other side

I've done so many wrongful deeds
And never battered an eye

But now as I approach a road
Which leads to a final end?

I recall all the harm I've done
To the very ones I love

So I'll try to mend the hurt
And ease the pain I've caused

If only I could be forgiven
Is it too late for me?

I ask dear God, in the prayers
Which resides within my heart?

To give me strength, to face my fate
And accept what comes to me

For those I've wronged along the way
I'll plead, they'll grant me mercy

I'll ask for their forgiveness
But most of all, I'll ask for grace

To caress my very soul
For when the stars glow with brightness

And I'll know, I've reached my end
Peace will descend upon my being

As you reach to touch my face

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
March 18, 2007

Sands of Time

Interwoven between the rapture
Of the desert, I call life

Lies the loneliness deep within me
Of the love which has been lost

As I walk upon the sands of time
In the visions which appear to me

I search to find your presence
But a void was what I found

Each night that comes, I think of you
Wondering when it shall end

So I'll dwell upon the dreams we've shared
In the life we once embraced

And I'll let each memory, caress my soul
As I reach to kiss your lips

While the sweetness of your every breathe
Wakes me to the dawn

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
March 06, 2007

A Brother Remembers

Dedicated To: Simon Noel Ruiz

I remember the year of '59
The day that you were born

It was the 1st of December
And boy was it cold outside

I need to roll it back a little
To give you a clearer view

It started around 3 am
So early in the morn

Dad did wake me with a shake
To let me know the score

I just turned twelve, two months before
So I guessed he trusted me

He spoke real low
So not to wake our sisters

Who were sleeping so peacefully?
To tell me Mom was ready to deliver

He told me, I was to be in charge
While they were to be away

I remember the words he spoke to me
Just like it was yesterday

"So take good care of your sisters
For probably the rest of the day"

I said yes Sir, as I followed behind
As they marched out the kitchen door

I heard the car's engine, come to life
In the coldness of the night

I remember standing by the door
And thinking of what to do

Wondering if Mom would be alright
As the car sped, into the frozen air

I walked over to our sisters
Who were still so fast asleep?

I looked down at Deanna
With Dolores next to her side

That's when I pondered, what kind of baby
Would you turn out to be?

As I stumbled back to the warm bed
I'd left a while ago

It didn't take very long
To fall asleep again

Later in the frosty morn
The phone began to ring, two long, one short

For a party line we had
I heard dear Dad say ever so clear

"Your Mother and brother are doing fine
So tell the girls, for me"

So that little brother, is how I remember
The day you can to be

I just wish Mom and Dad were here
To fill in, what I left out

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
March 1, 2007

Eyes of a Wiser Man

Dedicated: To those who've wept with a broken heart

Between the tears of a broken heart
Reside bitter sweet memories of my former life

They come to haunt me, in the lateness of the night
Reminding me of mistakes I've made, along the road of strife

Like a ship being tossed, by the gales of a ragging sea
So goes my every thought

Stirring dreams from another past
As I try to forget, in the wee hours of the morn

I wish so hard to block the love I keep
Inside my tormented soul

But each time, the visions of you appear
In the clarity of my mind

Revamping all the hurt you've caused
In the dungeons of my heart

I've searched to find another
To steer the pain away

But it's not as easy as one would think
To wash your sins away

And erase the harm you've caused
Within the fiber of my being

What a fool was I?
To believe those blatant lies

The very ones you swore to me
In the coldness of your tone

But I was blind, so much in love
How could I not believe?

It was fate that showed the honest truth
Which made me see the light?

Now I know the real you
Your wickedness shines so true

And like a ship lost at sea
Which has been thru a terrible storm?

My life goes on, all battered and bruised
In a lesson, I've learned from life

For the love I lost, in losing you
Will always be felt inside

And I view the passion of another
Thru the eyes of a wiser man

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
February 20, 2007

Jaded Memories

In the jagged edges of the dawn, lie the jaded memories from another past
They come at night in my thoughts, to lull me back to a quieter place

Which bring sweet tears of joy, as I hold you in my arms
Why did time take this away, when we were young, so much in love?

Life can be cruel at times, playing tricks within our souls
And now your heart, soul and body, belongs to someone else

That which is meant to be, can never be undone
So I'll take what comes to me of you, in the fantasies of the night

And wish we had traveled together, along the road of life
Alas, for that is not to be, so beware my faded love

For in the fondness I keep, for what we once embraced
I pray you'll find the happiness, you so deserve, in the confines of your heart

Where my love for you will never wane
In the solitude of my dreams

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
February 13, 2007

Cavern of Dreams

I hear the echoes of loneliness, so sharp and clear, in the cavern of my dreams

They come at night to torture me, for the words I could not say

The resounding memories from another time, lie deep between my thoughts
Cascading off the walls of despair, which resides within my heart

If only I could forget the love I hold for you, inside my wretched soul
It would help release depressions of guilt, for the words I failed to say

Now as I try to tell you, the way I truly feel
Your eyes look the other way, you have no room for me

So my words of love will not be heard, no matter what I do
For your heart has flown to another one, who was not afraid to say

The very words I left unspoken
I'll love you dear, forever more

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
February 06, 2007

Far Away Friend

Dedicated To: Mystic Bluebell

My thoughts turn towards the east, across the shinning sea

Where Angels, rainbows, and painted stars enlightens the distance, that lies between our souls

I take this time to send a prayer, and wish the best for you

And pray that God will heal the hurt you feel inside, and take your pain away

May your stay be short, and your return be quick, to the place you call your home

For you give so much to those who care, and they'll miss you while you're away

Sweet tears of joy will be cried by all, with your safe return back home

So please get well, and come back soon, to the place where you belong

And share your thoughts to one and all, in a style we've come to know

So to you my friend, from all of us, we send our love to you

We hope that you'll soon be here

To share your gift with us

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz

February 02, 2007

Passion of your Love

Dedicated To: Sal & Carmen Garcia

In the realm of our souls, lies the emptiness of despair, for those who don't believe

It curls the stomach, blinds our thoughts, and leaves no room for love

While it lurks, and waits, in lure of the direction we shall take

On the road we'll travel, towards our place in time

I know these words so very well, for once I felt this way

But since you walked into my life, you turned the night to day

Which brings a clearness to my mind, as well as too my eyes

Now I see thru tears of joy, the love you have for me

You show concern with all your care, and it's free for all who'll ask

But once your grace has filled the heart, it melts the sin away

This empty shell I call my life, will never be the same

And I'll live the passion in your love, for the rest of eternity

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz

January 24, 2007

Shadows of the Night

Dedicated: To those who mend the broken hearts

Have you ever wondered why memories remain so deep inside our souls?
In the outer limits of the stars, is where my dreams of you are stored

It is there your face reflects, the amber's of the twilight
Which lessen the pain that's held of you, in the shadows of the night?

While the beauty of your memory, remains entrenched inside my thoughts
This helps to heal the loneliness that resides within my heart?

It's been three years, since you left my side, how empty is this shell
For I never thought I could find another, to match the love we shared

In my search of a special one, to replace the emptiness which haunts me so?
I found a soul mate, who helps overcome, the sadness of your lost

This absolves the clouds of guilt I feel, and sends the hurt away
But my thoughts for you will always be, of the passion we once embraced

And the love I'll share, with the one who mends a broken heart
Will sparkle like diamonds in the sky, as we soar towards our dreams

Written by: Roland R. Ruiz
January 11, 2007